Friday, December 10, 2010

Superstition

We have something very big happening in our lives right now. So big that I can't even overshare on the internet about it. (It is not a kid, so stop that right now.) I want to talk about it but I keep myself from doing so out of fairness to my husband and my inability to eat crow. Not a huge fan of the whole mea culpa game. I prefer to avoid the whole mess altogether.

I don't really like the roller coaster that major life decisions take you on. Remember that scene in Parenthood where Steve Martin is on a life roller coaster at his kids' play? That scene is awful and scary and gross. I wish my life were a sunny day, walking the gentle slopes, and nothing more surprising than an eagle calling to its mate. If I had my way, life would be boring and predictable and I could plan for every contingency.

So I've been living my life with fingers crossed, avoiding cracks, and not spilling salt. I don't want to jinx this very big thing, and I'm running out of "good vibe" euphemisms to throw at it. It's time to avoid thinking about it because I so don't have control over any of it.

On a more positive note, I ran 2 miles yesterday and am pain-free today. The library got a slew of new music in so I've been bopping along to Cat Power and a swear-free Kanye West. I have been referring (in my head) to the swear free music as neutered. Actually, castrated would be a better choice.

If I have no control over many major life things, I can at least listen to music that has swears.

2 comments:

  1. Dammit. I wish I hadn't read this because I am way too curious now. All I can think of is that you are moving, got a big promotion or you're publishing a cookbook. WHAT?!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I adore Cat Power. When Mike and I got married, I walked down the aisle to one of her songs from the covers album.

    Good luck with the 'something big', and hopefully we'll hear about it when you're ready!!

    ReplyDelete